Parental Failure
I got the note today. The one from a teacher that says my kid is not completing his assignments and is falling behind. It’s not the first, it won’t be the last, but lately, I’ve received quite a few of these.
First, I’m angry with the kid. Then, I’m angry with the teacher – she needs to let me know when he starts to fall behind. (She has, but that’s beside the point.) Finally, I realize at whom my anger is really directed. Me. This is on me.
It’s my job to make sure he’s doing his work. I know I can’t do this forever, but it’s, for damn sure, my job now. Right now, I’m too damn worried about pleasing editors, co-workers and vice presidents instead of attending to my own child’s needs. I’m too damn worried about making sure my little cog of a giant corporation remains greased while I leave my 14-year-old son with Asperger’s Syndrome to fend for himself.
Note to self: get your head out of your arse, determine what’s really important and do something about it.
This is on me, Bean. I’m sorry I let you down.
Wow! I think you’re beating yourself up way too much! Parents who have children with special needs, need lots of resources outside of their families to ensure a proper education for their children. Part of parenting is teaching our children independance for those who will successfully move out into the world separate from us. Some children will need assisted living accommodations and still need to learn to do many things for themselves.
If our children are failing, I think the big picture needs to assessed and asking why, what, where, how, who before we blame ourselves.
Barbara
26 Aug 10 at 1:04 PM